We aren’t broken. We don’t need to be fixed.

We aren’t broken. We don’t need to be fixed.

I wanted to remind you of this fact for one fundamental reason, because you are worthy as you are. 

As women, we are told many things. We are instructed to be polite, sweet, smart, but not too smart, kind, quiet, and driven, but not too driven. Many cultural and societal norms tell us who we are “supposed to be.” 

These norms leave us feeling fractured. These societal constructs make us feel like we are not enough—that our bodies aren’t thin enough, that our jobs aren’t good enough, that we aren’t cut out for following our dreams or fighting for the things we want. The world defines weakness for us, and we are expected to “fix” those weaknesses.

So I am here to remind you that you do not need to be fixed, because you are not broken. There is nothing wrong with you. You are worthy as you are. Exactly as you are.

This feels like a difficult concept to accept when diet culture has been shoving our “flaws” down our throats our entire lives. Telling us that we must look a certain way, and that if we cannot achieve that look, that we have no willpower, that we have failed, that we lack motivation.

Simply, none of that is true. We all have things we want to work on. We all have qualities or characteristics that we would like to improve. For me, I struggle with balancing my relationship with myself and my relationships with others. Sometimes I look inward and feel that I am selfish, that I request a lot from others but don’t always return it. I want to work on that. I want to be a better friend, a better partner, a better sister, and a better daughter. But I am not broken. I do not need to be fixed.

You can want to improve yourself while understanding that nothing is broken, and nothing needs to be fixed. It can be about you and who you want to be, how you want to show up and contribute to the world, and not about how society says you need to act.

In a particularly raw therapy session a few months ago I was crying, telling my therapist that I felt so broken, like there was something wrong with me because of my depression and some of the relationships in my life. She immediately told me I was not broken. That was her immediate response and that stuck with me.

I cling to that all the time. The truth that I am not perfect, but I am not broken. There is nothing in me that needs to be fixed, and there is nothing in you that needs to be fixed either.